Etiquette Classes in Central Florida » Bad Manners

Thank You Note?

Ginny Brown — Tue, 09 Jun 2009 17:14:55 +0000

I enjoy reading Rhonda Rich’s column in the Sunday issue of The Gwinnett Daily Post. I think she is a very talented writer and has a great sense of humor. I have commented on her articles before in my blog. I pay special attention to her articles when they focus on manners. Sunday’s article was about thank you notes. She raised a point which caused me to do some thinking.

Basically what the article was about was the expectation of receiving a thank you note. I gathered from her article that Ms. Rich is a believer in thank you notes and practices this form of etiquette. I, too, believe in writing a thank you note and teach this in my etiquette classes. A point made in the article was to give with your heart and not have set expectations of receiving a thank you note. She pointed out that we never know what is going on in the person’s life who has received the gift which you sent. I agree with her totally. We don’t walk in other people’s shoes. As Ms. Rich said, the recipient could have a serious personal situation that they are experiencing. Life happens, and we don’t always get the thank you note written even though we have good intentions to do this.

I don’t know that I expect a note when I send a gift or do something for someone. Yes, I do like receiving them, and I try very hard to send thank you notes. However, I think we all need to remember that we don’t give with the intention of receiving the note. We don’t need to judge the person who doesn’t send us the thank you note. Having said this, I believe that it is still good manners to send a thank you note and especially under normal circumstances.

I would love to hear your thoughts on this topic.

Ginny Brown
The Etiquette School of Northeast Georgia
Hoschton, Georgia (Hamilton Mill area, Dacula, GA)
Email Ginny Brown
770-296-4159 cell

http://etiquette-blog.com

Practicing Everyday Etiquette

Ginny Brown — Fri, 06 Mar 2009 13:00:41 +0000

When was the last time someone held the door open for you? When was the last time someone held the dinner chair for you? Have you called a person’s phone only to have it answered by a child who then screams into the phone for their parent to answer? How many responses did you get to the last invitation you sent? I’m sure that you have noticed and felt the laxity in our society’s manners. Yes, our society is more casual than our parents’ time. Some of that is alright. What isn’t acceptable is having poor manners. As you will recall from one of my previous topics, manners and etiquette are based on respect. Having good manners is all about being respectful.

As you have observed from my comments above, I’m talking about just using everyday manners. I like it when the door is held for me, when the car door is opened for me, and when my chair is pulled out for me at the dinner table. It shows respect for me. The person demonstrating these manners distinguishes himself from others. In my parents’ era, it was the norm for the man to open a door for a woman. Today, it is permissible for this not to be gender oriented. Women can and do open doors for men and especially in the business world. It’s an act of kindness and respect.

Take time and think about a situation where maybe you didn’t use your manners as you should have done. We have all done this at one time or another including myself. Manners need to be used at home and when we go out in public. I ask myself if I answer the phone abruptly and speak in an irritated voice? Was I in a rush and didn’t wait to hold the door for the other person coming behind me? Did I constantly interrupt the conversation at the last dinner I attended? Did I remember to respond to an invitation? All these things matter. If some one thinks enough of us to invite us to a function, we need to remember to respond to the invitation. Show courtesy when engaging in conversation. Show courtesy and wait a second and hold that door for the person behind you. Use a pleasant voice when using the telephone. I’ll write about telephone etiquette in another topic.

We all need to use our manners. I’m willing to bet you will notice a difference in the way a person responds to you when you remember your manners. I know I do. You know how you feel when someone uses their best manners towards you. It’s a good feeling.

Questions or comments are always appreciated.

Ginny Brown
The Etiquette School of Northeast Georgia
Hoschton, Georgia (Hamilton Mill area, Dacula, GA)
Email Ginny Brown
678-889-4814 office
770-296-4159 cell

http://etiquette-blog.com

Do You Know The Answers To These Etiquette Questions?

Ginny Brown — Sun, 21 Dec 2008 14:11:18 +0000

Have some fun with the questions below and see what you know!

A male is seated to the right of a female.
Place your napkin in your chair when you excuse yourself from the table.
Elbows are never permitted on the table while dining.
The date on a thank you note always appears in the top right hand corner of the paper.
It is permissible to turn your coffee cup upside down on the saucer indicating that you do not want coffee.
When introducing a person in the same age category and the same sex, it doesn’t matter who is introduced first.
It doesn’t matter which way the blade of the knife rests on your plate while eating.
When served a cream soup, rest the soup spoon on the service plate.
It doesn’t matter when you send a thank you note just as long as you send one.
When shaking someone’s hand, make sure you give them a soft handshake so as not to hurt their hand.

Questions and comments are always appreciated.

Ginny Brown
The Etiquette School of Northeast Georgia
Hoschton, Georgia (Hamilton Mill area, Dacula, GA)
Email Ginny Brown
678-889-4814 office
770-296-4159 cell

http://etiquette-blog.com