Do you write thank you notes for gifts received or for things which have been done for you? I believe that society has become somewhat casual in the etiquette of writing thank you notes. While I was growing up, I was instructed to write thank you notes for gifts or anything else that someone had done for me. I did the same with my children. My grown children have become accustomed to finding a box of notes in their stockings at Christmas!
What is the etiquette on thank you notes? When do you write a thank you note? Is one always necessary? How long do you have to send a note after receiving a gift? Is a note sent by e-mail sufficient?
You always send a note when you have received a gift or when someone has done something for you. There are a couple of exceptions. If you have received a gift for a birthday or a holiday and you thanked the giver in person, then a note is not mandatory. The note, however, is still a much appreciated touch. If a person has insisted that you not send a note, and you have thanked them in person, then a note is not necessary. If you are sick and not able to send a note, it is permissible to have a family member do this for you.
If you receive a gift for something you did for someone, do you then have to write a thank you note for your gift? Yes, you do. Even though the gift was the person’s way of thanking you, you still need to show your appreciation by writing a note.
Etiquette Class
In my etiquette classes, I teach that one should write a thank you note within three to five days of receiving a gift. Thank you notes should be done promptly. What about wedding thank you notes? I have received several questions recently regarding these notes. The rule of thumb for writing wedding thank you notes is three months after the gifts have been received. However, it is better to write when you receive the gifts.
Is a note by e-mail considered a proper thank you? No, it is not. A hand written note is considered the proper form of saying thank you.
Questions or comments are always appreciated.
Ginny Brown
The Etiquette School of Northeast Georgia
Hoschton, Georgia (Hamilton Mill area, Dacula, GA)
Email Ginny Brown
678-889-4814 office
770-296-4159 cell
on Jan 13th, 2009 at 12:45 pm
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